“‘I think it’s time for a drink,’ I couldn’t believe he said that”.
“But, we’re on our way to a funeral Dad.
“And, my mother’s early morning request to take care of him had, once again, to be reinterpreted.”
That’s just the beginning of Irishman Brian Neville’s tales, that he’ll be telling crowds at the St Patrick’s Day themed Autumn Festival.
“It really did happen, I went to a funeral for a cousin of mine with my father,” Mr Neville said.
“He was quite an old man then and it’s the interaction between the two of us at this tragic scene.”
Born in the 1940s in Dublin, Mr Neville has written short stories about his life, hypocrisy in politics and current affairs for more than 15 years.
Some of it’s true, some of it isn’t – guessing is half the fun.
“I think the Australian and Irish sense of humour is very similar, it’s outrageous and irreverent,” Mr Neville said.
“I play on the Irish accent, I probably overdo it sometimes.
“I know that 20 years ago I would never get up and speak in front of people but by going to these little groups you break that fear and it becomes exciting.
“You still get nervous though obviously.”
Mr Neville is looking forward to sharing the stories he’s collected over a lifetime at the Autumn Festival.
He just hopes people can understand them, given there’s no subtitles.
“St Patrick’s Day is when Saint Patrick arrived in Ireland and changed the Pagans into Christians – which I’m not sure was a good idea,” he said.
“He also got rid of the snakes, which is very strange because there’s still politicians in Ireland.”
One of his stories is about The Beatles arriving in Ireland and the effect of that on himself and his neighbourhood.
There are words in Gaelic he feels make for better expression than English, like iontach, for example, that means amazing or wonderful.
Mr Neville said he enjoys seeing the reaction from the audience.
“I can put it on you know, I’ve got a great tongue on me,” he said.
Irish Tales is on Saturday at 4:30pm in Civic Park.